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Member
As Alice said there will be changes in her view on this, it will be a rollercoaster ride for a while until she decides how accepting she is going to be, just hang on tight and hope she goes for total acceptanc, it sounds promising though, now that the initial shock has passed.
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Junior Member
Tracy
I think that as attitudes have changed over the past forty years, the reasons for keeping CD'g a secret have lessened somewhat (though they are still there). This may help you explain to your wife why you first kept it a secret, and that when you first start keeping a secret it is hard to stop, barring some major event. Her finding the clothes was that major event. Whether that event was truly accidental or a subconscious act on your part, there you are and it seems to be heading in a better direction.
FWIW, I do hope it was a subconscious act on your part as this would seem to indicate that you are ready for this. Go a little slow on the details, femme names and all. Give her time to digest this, but continue to show the strength of the man she's known and loves. As my wife has discovered, my female side has made me a more complete and better person. And maybe go rent "Tootsie" with Dustin Hoffman and inject a little humor if you think it'll help her.
Good luck,
Jane
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Junior Member
Hugs Tracy.... hang in there!
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Tracy, two weeks have passed since your last remarks. Please tell us how things are going, now.
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Silver Member
what did you expect to happen when she found out, 40 years of deception is a lot to swallow, just saying.
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I told my wife after nearly 10 years of marriage and had the usual questions (Am I gay, Do I want to be a woman, etc). The thing that hurt her most was the secrecy... My wife did accept (to a point) and laid out some ground rules. Be ready for lots of questions and give her time to recover from her shock...
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