This is the question I ask myself these days. I love to dress and I have a couple outfits that I think look very cute on me. But this is all from the neck down. I have facial hair and my wife likes it, she hates when I am clean shaven. Myself, I don't care much either way. As a guy I surely look better with my stash but it does make it hard to go into girl mode. So I ask myself, what do I want? And the truth is I am not sure. I have been in the closet for over 40 years. In the past few years there have been some people who have found out so it isn't a total secret any longer. Panties, nylons, skirts, cute tops, I love it all. I would guess that I wear clothes fit for a girl maybe 20 years younger than I. I think at times I dress as I wish my SO would dress but she is a jeans and t-shirt sort of woman and there isn't much I can do about that. I am way more girly than she is when it comes to clothes.
So my struggle is do I want to go out as an obvious man in drag or do I want to get a facial make over and try to pass as a woman. I mean, I know I want to do this at least once. I have the need to, I want to see how much of a girl is truly within me. I think a professional make over and some beauty shots would be a lot of fun. But, I am talking on a daily basis who do I want to be. This is a real issue for me because I am happy being a guy but at the same time I have a true NEED to dress as a girl and this is as uncontrollable as most of you understand.
Being accepted as a woman when completely made over is important to many of you, I don't think I feel that to that extent. I'm still working on it in my mind but I think I just want to be accepted as a man in drag which in many ways is even more difficult because I am not trying to blend into the crowd I am simply trying to be me. Anyone else feel this way?