I know that I am not a woman. I never will be. I used to wish, most every day, that I was. I have (mostly) given up that wishing. It just led to disappointment.
Recently charGG asked in a thread whether forum members cared if they passed. I chose not to answer her because my answer is entangled with this wish. Since I do not go out dressed en femme (a concession to my marriage, but also I know that I am (and look like) a trans woman at best, not a cis woman, passing has not been a goal of mine.
I do not think of myself as a woman. How could I ever know what it was like to grow up female in this culture? I had years of “boy training.” Similarly, there is no way that a woman, or a male who does not have gender dysphoria, could ever know what it is like to be someone like me (us). I assume that most on this forum can relate to what I am describing.
I do not want to pretend to be something that I am not and will never be. That is not healthy for me. Being a non transitioning mtf transperson is not the same as being a cisgender woman. I like to feel feminine, wear feminine clothes, emulate a certain style of femininity (I have come to learn that there are many), but I have accepted that I am not (and do not look like) a woman. Nancy
