What is a transvestite?

[Beth-Lock]

If my psychotherapist calls me a transvestite, what can this mean? I thought I was just transgendered in the process of transition.
Does he mean:
1) I am a sexual pervert.
2) I am a cross-dressing sex trade worker.
3) Something else.

I am sincerely perplexed. I know that the term in question is in a process of change of meaning, but I am not sure of the exact extent of how far and wide the meanings extend. What is your experience with the usage of this word?

[karen68]

Hi beth I take it to mean that you are of one gender that likes to dress as the other gender, mainly male dressing as female, but could also be female dressing as male.

[Carole Cross]

The desinition of a transvestite is a person who dresses in the clothes of their opposite gender.

[Teri Jean]

Beth, a transvestite can mean different things in different areas of the world. In England it means someone who wears the clothes of the opposite sex, as Karen and Carole have stated. Hear in the states it has a different meaning of dressing as a female for sexual gratification. The other issue is transvestite was commonly used up to a while back to discribe what we refer to as transgender today.

Teri

[Beth-Lock]

Actually, I am living in the 'other' gender, and have been for most of this year now.

[Veronica_Jean]

Actually, I am living in the 'other' gender, and have been for most of this year now.

This sounds like a therapist that does not know what they are talking about.


If you have been living full time as the opposite gender, this sounds like a lot more than just "cross dressing", which is another term for transvestite.

:2c:

Veronica

[CharleneT]

Well... one thing it means is that your therapist doesn't keep up on the lit. Transvestite is an older term that long ago fell out of favor/use.

Not saying your therapist is not good ... just behind on his/her reading !

[whitelace]

The usage of nomenclatures to describe or chart a persons behavior can best be found in your DSM-4th edition. and similar pulications as you well know. For the purposes of discussion on our forum we tend to popularize certain labels and since we live our lives our in the trenches so to speak ,I'm sure we can understand you asking us, I have ample time on my hands today recovering from a seasonal head cold so I'll supply you with my 2cents worth.

I am thinking that Transvestite is an older term to describe what a crossdresser is today but not entirely. I used to use the term to describe myself where I really didn't know of any other that came close. I actually liked using the word but since I became exposed to Rocky Horor and others depicted that are similar I feel we can spread Transvestite on those and we can look on others that maybe a bit more sophisticated in appearance and conviction that eminate a more down to earth persona, and in many cases live, present in the public eye and take themeselves much more seriously as "Crossdressers" and futher transgendered. I myself find the label T-girl to be confusing as well because it can have more then one meaning to describe an individual.

Hugs to all

Love Lacy:battingeyelashes:

[sfwarbonnet]

I think the word Crossdresser is now used in lieu of Transvestite. Going further with probably obsolete terminology, I would say a ******* is a person that has boobs and presents herself as a woman, but is a functioning male between the legs. Right?

[Beth-Lock]

Going further with probably obsolete terminology, I would say a ******* is a person that has boobs and presents herself as a woman, but is a functioning male between the legs. Right?

I think you are factually right about '*******' and unfortunately it is not yet obsolete. It seems to be used mainly in circles that are one rung below, in terms of classiness, that of Gerry Springer.

[Melissa A.]

If your therapist knows you are transitioning and calls you a transvestite, I would say this person really doesn't know what they are talking about, and is, whether knowingly or unknowingly, showing you very little respect. I would expect more of a professional charged with helping you navigate the process.

"*******" is a really, really derogatory term(in my opinion and the opinions of many people I know, anyway) often used in the online sex industry to describe some kind of transgender person. I can't imagine anyone outside that world being ok with it.

Hugs,

Melissa:)

[Beth-Lock]

If your therapist knows you are transitioning and calls you a transvestite, I would say this person really doesn't know what they are talking about, and is, whether knowingly or unknowingly, showing you very little respect. I would expect more of a professional charged with helping you navigate the process.

Melissa:)
Thanks Melissa. The therapist dates back in my life history to long before I actually tried to transition, and I think is near retirement now. But he has threatened to block my transition when it gets to hormone replacement therapy or GRS. He just does not believe in the whole idea, I think. But finding a replacement may be impossible due to the on-going shortage where I am. Nonetheless, I am wondering if he is deliberately antagonizing me to get me to quit him.
But I wanted to post this question to see if I was overreacting, or getting his message wrong. I fear, while my reaction might have been a little exaggerated, I was basically close to being on track. It means a lot to me to have a forum like this where I can draw on the perceptions of others. When you are deep in a situation, you cannot always think clearly enough.

[trannie T]

As you have explained it, it appears that your therapist does not recognise you as being a transsexual but only as a man who chooses to wear womens clothing. Judging the relationship between you and your therapist by his use of one word is difficult, if your relationship is otherwise good continue to see him if it is not consider your other options.

[Stephenie S]

Sweetie, why don't you ask him/her?

I think you need another therapist. Well actually, I KNOW you need another therapist as this one has already told you he would block your transition. If you want to transition, then you are going to HAVE to get another therapist. They are on line, you know. PM me if you want a name and phone number. Don't allow yourself to be manipulated by a gatekeeper. Find another one.

Stephie

[Hephaestus]

I drive a little over two hours sometimes to see mine. I had bad experiences right around where I live.. so I wanted to go to Atlanta where some more accepting, specialized doctors were. Since he works with the transgender population often, he is used to clients being uninsured, and so has a very cheap rate.. see if something like that is in a nearby city.

He really sounds like he isn't respecting what your wishes are, or that he thinks that men who want to be women are weirdos.

The doctor I had when I was 14 told me "men who wear women's clothing at adolescence.. grow up to be men who break into women's houses with axes to steal their panties when they are adults." So yeah. Not everyone with an eduction in mental health is a good person to see about this... some definitely bring their prejudices to the table.

[Miranda09]

I tend not to use the word as it's just another label that doens't really mean anything. It doesn't matter how it's defined. All that matters is how you precieve yourself and how you feel about this part of your personality. Once you're comfortable with that, then you define what the term means. :)

[Beth-Lock]

He really sounds like he isn't respecting what your wishes are, or that he thinks that men who want to be women are weirdos.
....
Not everyone with an eduction in mental health is a good person to see about this... some definitely bring their prejudices to the table.

That about sums it up!

[Starling]

..."men who wear women's clothing at adolescence.. grow up to be men who break into women's houses with axes to steal their panties when they are adults."...

Your doc's line was hilarious and awful, Hephie. I would restate it more accurately: "Adolescent men who wear women's clothing grow up to marry women who wear their size."

:heehee: Lallie

[Sammy777]

Transvestism
Transvestism is the practice of cross-dressing, which is wearing clothing of the opposite sex.

The relationship between transvestism and transsexualism has been debated over the decades and its position within the different diagnostic categories has changed several times during this time. The International Classification of Diseases, 10th Edition (ICD-10) divides transvestism into two main types: fetishistic transvestism and dual-role transvestism. They have some fundamental differences, which are described in more detail below, but significantly it is dual-role transvestism that is included as a gender identity disorder, whereas fetishistic transvestism is not.

Fetishistic transvestism

Fetishistic transvestism, as the name suggests, refers to cross-dressing associated with sexual excitement. It tends to involve clothing of a particularly sexual or erotic nature, often inappropriate to the person's age or social setting and is usually accompanied with masturbation. After sexual climax, the urge to cross-dress usually stops and, for some people, can involve feelings of embarassment or even revulsion. The behaviour usually remains relatively stable over time and is often kept hidden, rarely presenting to specialist services. It is therefore very difficult to measure, in terms of how common it is, but studies have suggested that as many as 50% of men have cross-dressed, with between 5-10% doing it on a regular basis.

Dual-role transvestism

Dual-role transvestism is different in that it is a disorder of gender identity. Unlike fetishistic transvestism, men displaying this condition spend significantly more time in the female role. It is not usually sexually driven but may have originally started in a fetishistic way. It is much more likely to be associated with enjoyment of female feelings and individuals tend to dress in more age-appropriate clothing with a much less erotic component. Some dual-role transvestites may even live full-time in female clothes but an important distinction from transsexualism is that the men concerned do not feel that they are truly female. They always retain their core gender identity as being male, have an emotional investment in keeping their original male persona and body, and do not wish to seek specialist help to change gender. Dual-role transvestites are almost always men, usually heterosexual and see themselves as cross-dressers and not transsexuals.

Relationship with transsexualism

Dual-role transvestism may orginate from fetishistic transvestism and, in a small number of cases, can precede transsexualism. The change to transsexualism is usually gradual over a long period of time with increasing feelings of being identifed as the opposite gender with associated gender dysphoria. At this point, dual-role transvestites may seek help to permanently change gender. For these individuals, with support and time, they come to realize that they are actually transsexuals, but they represent a very small proportion of the transvestite population.

[morgan pure]

I haven't read everybody-but-

I used to be a pure transvestite with no intention (that I knew of then) of transitioning or anything. No one can deny that fetishism plays a part. I still only get horny when I'm in a bra.

For the transexual personality locked into, say-a relationship, transvestism is a welcome occasional release. And a lot of fun. I did it for years. Dressing out in the world-in public-even if it's a neighborhgood gay bar on Lexington Ave. with other people it reminds you that you are not alone and that there are even guys who dig you. Anybody here know Karalyn? Well she's still running 2 nights a week, now in NJ. Nice mix of tv's and ts's. I never get there, but I mean to. Karalyn's a transvestite-and a Republican!

[helenr]

I think Samantha pretty much spelled out the distinctions. When I was young in the 1950's the only term in use was transvestite. The dictionary used definitions like 'morbid desire' to dress in the opposite sex's undergarments,etc. I am not sure how the word 'morbid' ever applied, but maybe related to the sexual climax with its powerful effect. I think of it today as the fetish component crossdressing-entire purpose is to end up with an orgasm. I am sure that many Crossdressers-especially older ones-don't get the sexual stimulation any more-crossdressing becomes old hat.

I think that for many who get older-in their 50's and 60's the reality sets in that you are not going to change your status quo so easily-dreams and fantasy fade away. So a drive to head towards transgenderism- and perhaps a bit of disdain for the fetish crossdressing or transvestism for sex sake only- becomes the focus. Hormones and anti androgens insure that you don't get any more 'morning stiffies' from wearing lingerie to bed, the desire to self arousal fade fast-as if, why bother going to all that trouble since it takes a lot of time, patience, good vibrator to get any thrill. Instead a sense of calmness, appreciation of beauty in the world, lack of jazzed up testosterone excitement and anger tend to fade. not so great if you have the responsibility to service a female, but that's how it can be.

[Andi]

Transvestite........... I know that the term in question is in a process of change of meaning, but I am not sure of the exact extent of how far and wide the meanings extend. What is your experience with the usage of this word?

Well, there seems to be continuing views on the definition of transvestite, crossdresser, transgender, transsexual,......The problem is most everyone (oustside of this community) finds these terms uncomfortable and continue to rebuke, humiliate, and reject folks who display any opposite sex dressing or behavior. Personal rights are still abused/denied in spite of the few success stories of folks on this forum. Television and newsprint continue to cover the topic only as sensationalism to drum up ratings. In my community "transvestite" is viewed as bad or worse than having aids or being gay (both viewed pretty bad). There are still ordinances in many areas of the country against a man appearing in public dressed as a woman. It doesn't really matter what the definitions are, the world is still widely un-accepting and intolerant. IMHO! Yes, I am one of the undesirables so you can call what ever you wish.

[TerryTerri]

I, although I'm no type of expert or any such matter, think of a transvestite as one who dresses opposite their physical gender, but, see's themselves congruent to their physical gender. A transsexual is someone who internally identifies themselves as the opposite gender of their pyhsical gender. I am a transsexual 100% of the time but I seldom crossdress at this point in time. In my journey, at this point in my life, I am on an internal journey of transformation and discovery more than a physical change in appearence.
I see the difference in how one's gender identification is in relation to their physical gender.

[Mistybtm]

I wonder what i am ? I dress every day when i am home and for my dates (MALE) i am trying to grow womans breast but do not what to fully transition. I seldome go out that way unless at knight usualy very late. :battingeyelashes:

[Schatten Lupus]

I honestly have no idea what the official terms for anything is. I do know though transvestite use to be an umbrella term, and now to my best knowledge is someone who crossdressers for sexual purposes.

[Sallee]

then I would guess your a transgenderist

[Beth-Lock]

I went to see my gender therapist yesterday, and she came up with something worded differently in the DSM, but which would seem to be what my original therapist was getting at, when he used the antique term 'transvestite,' though it is not an exact match I think.
She does not feel I fit into that category. Apparently, a transvestite, whatever you call it, does not wear women's clothes full time, as I have been doing for most of the year.
I thank all those contributing, for describing and clarifying many fine points of this issue. It has really helped.

[sfwarbonnet]

Found these really-old threads (circa 2005) when looking for sumething elso, natch: Difference between cross dressing & transvestism? ********? Thought they might be oh interest now.

[Byanca]

Good question. I was at a gay pob yesterday. And people asked me directly. What are you?

I said I have no idea. I suspect I am something else entirely, possibly extraterrestrial.

[Jillt]

transvestite is a word derived from the latin, trans, meaning cross and vestite meaning dressing.

[Samantha B L]

I always thought a "transvestite" and a "crossdresser" were 98% the same thing. It was still "transvestite" when I was growing up and I always thought it all sounded like they were having a great time. People say "crossdresser" instead of "transvestite" in the same way that some people say "bath tissue" instead of "toilet paper". However,the term crossdresser does sound a little more intellegent and thoughtful. Terms like crossdresser,transgender and gender variant will go over a lot better with your local congressmen,citizens groups and the media than will "Transvestite".
"Crossdresser" is a more intellegent byword. I'm 53 and I first read the term "crossdresser" in a psychiatric and psychological paperback about The first Transexual operations along with a lot of stuff about "Transvestic Fetishism". That was in 1979. I was 23. But I'll confess I thought of myself as a Transvestite up until about 10 years ago.

[GinnySmith]

I've been dressing in women's clothing since I've been a small child. My family was about as normal as possible, but when my mother innocently dressed me a girl for halloween at about age 8 - wow! Something was happening but I didn't know what. I've been dressing off an on every since. The need is always there, but I've always been in the closet. Recently I feel life is passing Ginny by, so I'm have made a real effort to become passable and get out with other gurls. I started dressing well before the internet, and now, with the internet, I chat and share with other gurl like me daily.

My point is that this is a deep seated need that most of us seem have been born with. It must be some DNA coding or something, I really don't know. I've gotten beyond trying to figure out my label. If I had to pick a label for me I'd say I'm a "transvestite." To me that is a girl who takes dressing a little more seriously than a casual "crossdresser," but who is not biologically changing her body to become transgendered. Anyway, I don't worry about it and I recommend other gurls shouldn't either. Enjoy it as a gift, be kind to each other, and let the shrinks worry about the labels, Ginny

[Elle44]

Years ago I do believe the term transvestite referred to flamboyant drag queens looking for tricks as prostitutes before the Stonewall riots. Trust me they were very different than a GG prostitute looking for tricks. I considered myself a transvestite when I was young and beautiful and would venture out fully dressed and go to "the City", I lived in Jersey but would go across the river into NYC, no I did not hang on street corners on 42 st/times square propositioning. I went to nightclubs and had a good time. No men dating or any gay activity until I was 42 and met a pre op TS and then my whole life changed, found out why women loved doing what they do making love to men, since that time and relationship 23 years ago, I will and do date and go out with men as well as women and CD/TV/TS/TG, which I prefer the later.

[Emma England]

If you do not know the meaning of any word, look up http://dictionary.com

They quote a transvestite as:

a person, esp. a male, who assumes the dress and manner usually associated with the opposite sex

[Elle44]

Funny how describing person's of gender identity has changed over the years, gay is relatively new maybe the last 40 years, and we are all lumped in the gay category by most lay persons. It used to be queer, fag, fagot, homosexual, lesbian, dike, she male, transvestite, crossdresser, transsexual, LOL and a lot of vulgar terms to describe us. I never heard the word transgender until I was 35 years old in a psychiatrist's office and that was only 30 years ago, 1979. On a written test I got an 89 out of 100 and was determined as Transgender because of the way I felt on the inside and the test results. Dressing since I was 13 and before in dribs and drabs.

Transvestites were the word for, like I said, male hookers in drag at least 40 years ago and roamed city streets looking for tricks. I don't suppose many on here even heard of the Stonewall Riots, that and AIDS, right after that is when trans issues began to formulate and newer more sophisticated medical terms were adapted and laws started sweeping inner city's against discrimination of what became known as the "gay community", due to the fact that if persons such as us even got murdered, sentences were meted out light or none at all.

Many physiatrists still can't get it right, I was diagnosed manic depressive with my first trip to such an office in 1965 when I first wanted a sex change operation. Today it's called bi polar, they sic psychiatrists still don't know how to treat this that we have so they lump us in the sophisticated term of bi polar.

Do a little history research you'll be amazed as how the communities are not what we think they are or what a dictionary says it should be. Libraries are full of old newspapers of the terms 40-100 years ago as compared to our identities today. Shucks if a man were caught completely dressed with make up and a wig 40 years ago, you would be arrested and put in jail physically for impersonating a female, it was illegal, check it out or ask those that's been around awhile.

[Beth-Lock]

Dear Emma,
I consider myself to be an armchair philosopher. Most people think of themselves as psychologists of human nature.
I think that means that we philosophers and psychologists start with the dictionary but do not end there! No, we want to argue the point some more.
As a connoisseur of dictionaries, I think they vary too widely, perhaps because each new one does not want to infringe the copyright of the other recent ones, and so the compilers must always invent new definitions. This is not an ideal situation if you are trying to avoid confusion when looking things up in the dictionary. Then there are such things as correctness, political and otherwise. My old Shorter Oxford by Onions, does not even include it, not even in the section in the end for newly added words, and that dictionary is dated 1972. Ditto my treasured family heirloom, the 1936 Merriam Webster. Does this mean that the word was only considered the jargon of specialists in those days?
Anyway, I took the word, when applied to me as insulting. Maybe in a more light-hearted context, it might have been jokingly bandied around without offence though. But this was a deadly serious context.
I note that you chose just one of several definitions shown by the source you quote. They look rather elliptic when you go further down the page to the longer encyclopaedia quote.
To summarize, though it is too late to make a long story short: You can't trust dictionaries. Dr. Johnson I think said it. But then again, what would J. L. Austin say, and how would he have wanted to set out to compile a dictionary?

[sherri52]

It is only a cd. A person who dresses in the clothing of another. Other than those in the community, the majority of people do not even know the correct definition of many of the terms we use. Including Physcotherapists.

[marie rose]

I drive a little over two hours sometimes to see mine. I had bad experiences right around where I live.. so I wanted to go to Atlanta where some more accepting, specialized doctors were. Since he works with the transgender population often, he is used to clients being uninsured, and so has a very cheap rate.. see if something like that is in a nearby city.

He really sounds like he isn't respecting what your wishes are, or that he thinks that men who want to be women are weirdos.

The doctor I had when I was 14 told me "men who wear women's clothing at adolescence.. grow up to be men who break into women's houses with axes to steal their panties when they are adults." So yeah. Not everyone with an eduction in mental health is a good person to see about this... some definitely bring their prejudices to the table.

Heph; when I read your quote from the "learned" doctor I just burst out laughing. I couldn't help myself.