Things are changing.....

[princessmichelle]

Karren,



:trust, patience, you being awesome.

princessmichelle

[Kate Simmons]

One last thought on this Karren. It just occurred to me that the "nature of the beast" of a woman is to change her mind with no prior notice. I know, I lived with one for 35 years. That having been said, I'm not referring to any of our fine GG's here. I do know from experience though. She can change her mind so quickly and do a fast "180", it could make your head spin. Just proceed carefully and walk as softly as you can (in heels) and carry a big handbag, okay? Love you, Ericka Kay

[Sheila]

Karren,
Just to say that I am pleased that things look like they may be turning around for both of you, remember small steps.
Good luck for the future, keep us posted please, we all wish you well.
Jess(so)

[suanne]

Karen your thread has starting me thinking about my own situation here at home. My wife caught me years ago and it sure wasn't a fun time. I have had little things go wrong in the years in between. Like I forgot to put something away or dropped some article of clothing. You know what I mean. We don't talk about crossdressing at all! I am still in the closet when it comes to that subject. I have noticed that my wife will call me when she is on the way home or I will ask her when she will be home. When she gets home she will call out to let me know she is here, etc. I think she does that because she doesn't want to confront Suanne. I don't want that either. So I guess I am saying she knows I still dress and just doesn't want to face that. I don't want her to face that either with the reaction I got years ago. Do you think your wife is kind of doing the same thing. Is this some kind of unspoken way of accepting "a Karren or Suanne" for a unaccepting SO of a cder? I remember when you were "caught" and that brought back a flood of memories for me. I don't want to ever go through that type of a mess again. It was a long time before we ever got through that terrible time in our marriage. I feel like through the years we have grown in our love and respect for each other and to tell you the honest truth I think she knows I still dress. She just wants things to stay the way they are. Like....don't ask....don't tell. Make sense? Karren I really would like your input.

Suanne

[swiss_susan]

Great to hear that things are getting better for you babe, you deserve it.

[Noel Chimes]

Karen:
Every time I needed some inspiration I always went and read one of your threads or comments. So allow me to return a small piece of positive outlook. This weekend has been the best ever. Since I didn't have to work on Saturday I have spent the weekend enfemme, and all smiles from the Mrs.
Even got out and WALKED my entire block. O.k. it was 5:30a..m. but still the opportunity to get out. ( I know not a good time to be outside. I scouted my neighborhood as soon as I moved. ). But after seeing how much fun it is to get out I just had to try it. I'm not to the point of "why did I wait so long?" , but the nerves aren't as bad.
In short, thank-you for benig there. May the sun shine upon you once again.
Noel

[Kimmie W]

It's been just over a year since my wife discovered my "secret" and it gets better every day. The kids were back from school this summer and Kimmie had to lay low. This weekend was my first time fully dressed since May, WOW!!!! How I missed it! I used to dread the "feeling," now I miss it on the few days it's gone. Life is so boring as a man.

[DAVIDA]

Congrats on the progress! I hope things go smoothly and swiftly for you. I consider myself blessed to have a wife who helps mold my persona and my wish is for all of you to have accepting SOs!

[Karren H]

Karen your thread has starting me thinking about my own situation here at home. My wife caught me years ago and it sure wasn't a fun time. I have had little things go wrong in the years in between. Like I forgot to put something away or dropped some article of clothing. You know what I mean. We don't talk about crossdressing at all! I am still in the closet when it comes to that subject. I have noticed that my wife will call me when she is on the way home or I will ask her when she will be home. When she gets home she will call out to let me know she is here, etc. I think she does that because she doesn't want to confront Suanne. I don't want that either. So I guess I am saying she knows I still dress and just doesn't want to face that. I don't want her to face that either with the reaction I got years ago. Do you think your wife is kind of doing the same thing. Is this some kind of unspoken way of accepting "a Karren or Suanne" for a unaccepting SO of a cder? I remember when you were "caught" and that brought back a flood of memories for me. I don't want to ever go through that type of a mess again. It was a long time before we ever got through that terrible time in our marriage. I feel like through the years we have grown in our love and respect for each other and to tell you the honest truth I think she knows I still dress. She just wants things to stay the way they are. Like....don't ask....don't tell. Make sense? Karren I really would like your input.

Suanne

I totaly agree that I my wife is doing something simular...and early on we had talked about an arangement where I could dress when she wasn't around but never came to an agreement on when and where... And if this is her way of accepting my crossdressing then I'm happy....she does know I still dress on business trips..

And even though these are little things...they mean to me that she if getting more comfortable with me...and we'll see how things progress....slowely, at her pace.. Not mine!!


Love Karren

[Charleen]

You got it right when you said at her pace, not yours. Look at it as an engineering problem. Any structure needs a solid foundation. If you hurry that, then the rest will collapse after a time. Or if you like, if you properly brace a mine.......... I really hope this works out for you!
Love and xxxx, Lily

[suanne]

Karren I agree. I am not going to push anything at my house on the cding issue. There have been a few other things that my wife has said that would indicate that she knows I dress. We have been married for over 40 years and I think we know each other pretty well. This is "the issue" in our marriage that has been the hardest for us both. If things could stay this way I wouldn't mind. One thing you said that really stands out. That your wife is getting use to you dressing. Same thing with mine, I think. It's like when I came home and found that someone had put a dent in our new Jeep. Well we both we very upset and couldn't figure out where it came from but in a short time we kind of got use to seeing the dent. We didn't like it but we accepted it. Then one day I took it to the shop and had it fixed. Darn....wish Suanne was that easy to fix.

[Karren H]

It's like when I came home and found that someone had put a dent in our new Jeep. Well we both we very upset and couldn't figure out where it came from but in a short time we kind of got use to seeing the dent. We didn't like it but we accepted it. Then one day I took it to the shop and had it fixed. Darn....wish Suanne was that easy to fix.

Good analogy....and I hear there are "shops" in Tiwan that for a few thousand dollars can fix Suanne up pretty good!! Permanently!!

Hehehe

Love Karren

[pinkshelly]

My hart goes out to you Karren. I hope you are accepted for the beutifull woman and friend that you are. You are my insperation and my back bone 'causeyou get out and get it done. Thanks Karren.
Huggs, Shelly.

[Sam-antha]

Karen, it is good to know that you have not changed and that your wife has not changed either with respect to each other.
That is what being married is about. Accepting life with love.
~Samm
Oh, forgot ; being happy with it all.

[suanne]

Good analogy....and I hear there are "shops" in Tiwan that for a few thousand dollars can fix Suanne up pretty good!! Permanently!!

Hehehe

Love Karren

Holy Crap Karren.....(analogy) I don't want the fender cut off, I just want the dent out!

[Kimberley]

This is good news Karren. I hope the trend continues for you.


Kimberley

[brandie]

karren i am glad to her that thangs are going good for you i am kinda jelous becouse my wife is still fighting it and some day it is he??.
love brandie

[tekla west]

I think a 'live and let live' attiude is the most that a CD can hope for when it comes out this late in the deal. And all things considered, its not a bad deal, each get their own space, and it does not intrude either.

Glad to hear she is getting a bit less uptight about it, that does not mean that she is OK with it, just does not see it as a big enough deal to matter with, which is a different deal. Keep it in your space and don't bring it into mine is a doable notion at least.

[Karren H]

I'd take that, Kat!! I think most of us would settle for that too!!


Love Karren

[vbcdgrl]

Go, girl! Your vitality and sense of humor are an inspiration to us all.

Vikki

[avawho]

Karren, congratulations... Seems hard to believe that your dear wife found that small pile of clothes on the closet floor one whole year ago . Where oh where does the time fly? Just count your blessings the she is seemingly more receptive, try to savour (as if you need any more encouragement) every day to the fullest, and be "all things" to everyone in your household as you see fit.

Say... we are still waiting to hear if your son passed his driving test?

Cheers
Ava

[Blonde]

I will add my here

That sounds really great for you.

The same sort of thing happened for me all those years ago.
When my wife (GF at the time) "outted" me, she was concerned that she might be living with a woman one day.
But.........................
the more we talked about it, and the more information I found about being a CD (and sharing it with her), she came to accept it. We even, eventually, were able to shopping for stuff for "Blonde" together.
It took almost a year before we shopped for Blonde, since I had quite a bit already.

In summation, all I can think to say is it does take some time for her to eventually "get her head around it" (and it sounds like she is starting to). Maybe you can reasure her in private.

[Dawn29680]

Great that she is supportive enough to warn you

[Tracy_Victoria]

I think a 'live and let live' attiude is the most that a CD can hope for when it comes out this late in the deal. And all things considered, its not a bad deal, each get their own space, and it does not intrude either.

.

I think thats very true? Raksha and I have our first weekend together alone in a very very long time, coming up this weekend, I think we both hoped for a development but the closer it draws I can see it's just not going to happen.

I know I'm lucker than most, but sadly she just can't handle seeing me fully dressed, dispite her efforts I can just see it's all going to go pear shaped if we try, so I suppose the best thing is to be grateful for what I do have, rather than wish for more, and damage what I already have.

I know she will read this, so keep the beer coming whilst I do the kitchen for you!

ME XXXXXX