Katie, I am surprised at your position. As a martial artist of 30+ years I was taught and did the same to my students that you only use force as a last resort when you have absolutely no choice. You try to talk your way out, try to walk away and only as a last resort do you engage in a physical confrontation first to injure, then maim and lastly kill.
Yes we are capable of using a weapon and doing so very effectively. The difference here is that most girls dont have the training and experience and trying something that foolish is an invitation to disaster. Fight or flight means flight first and fight last.
Similarly all too often these quick learn self defense classes for women are equally as dangerous and for the same reasons. It will only escalate the situation. Fact if you cant take him down permanently the first time so there isnt a second punch, then make sure there isnt one at all.
