not even worth the time
not even worth the time
to the remainder of the cdr's I apologize for the gender driven comment regarding dress, I was and remain angry at the post of Penny but in no way was it intended to apply to the very vast majority of you who treat as we expect to be treated -- with respect so please accept my humble apology
Jess
I allow myself to set healthy boundaries ..... to say no to what does not align with my values, to say yes to what does.
Boundaries assist me to remain healthy, honest and living a life that is true to me
Just when I thought I've seen it all...Penny...I'm really at a loss for words here, I'm amazed you'd say such a thing. How can you compare Cders to GGs? I bet you 99% of them don't go out in public, but they look better? Hate to tell you, but if they looked so good, they'd be going out, ya think?
Am I screwed up too? I am full time, and I do admit to not making myself up as June Cleaver, I must really look like a slob in my jeans and sweatshirt. One more thing and then I'm heading for cover...you say that GGs go out looking bad? What about the men? It's funny how no one ever mentions them...though they do look pretty sharp with their beer guts poking out from their stained t-shirts, and their rear ends hanging out because they're so fat...oh, I'm sorry, I'm sure it's all Cary Grants by you!
Karen
and finally...........
I, personally have always respected women. I guess it's part of why I dress. I like understanding more about women. I've done the ''housewife'' thing with my first wife when she first started working on my days off. It was always a very busy day... Dusting, vacuuming, mopping, dishes, laundry, dress and feed the child, etc, etc... A lot of the times I've found my job as a man was easier.Originally Posted by mellisa's wife GG
This thread ALMOST left me speechless!!!!! Ask my hubby - it doesnt happen often.
Please excuse me now.. the catbox needs cleaned!!!!!!
BTW... Love your cat in your avatar pic. I'll have to post one of mine sometime.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
I wasn't going to post in this thread but this is a discussion board, and sometimes saying nothing can be perceived as agreeing, and I most certainly DO NOT AGREE with the original poster.
I think Ariel_TV's post is the one to focus on. IMHO the last thing a CDer should be doing is advocating that we follow sterotypical gender roles - that's "the pot calling the kettle black"
[SIZE="3"][SIZE="2"][SIZE="1"]NOTE: "The pot calling the kettle black" is an old-fashioned expression where an accusation is arguably equally applicable to the person doing the accusing as it is to the person they are accusing.[/SIZE][/SIZE][/SIZE]
Last edited by Rachel Morley; 01-04-2007 at 10:35 AM.
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The River City Gems - Northern California's largest and most active crossdressing & transgender support group!
Some of you CD's must live on Pluto, I see GG's every day in So, Cal. who do an outstanding job of putting themselves together to look great., Those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.
Ariel_TV,totally agree with you, we should respect other people's desired.In my opinion , Men have a responsibility , as the strong rugged sex , to live up to it. /sarcasm
We crossdressers should be the first peoples to promote liberty to dress, wear and look anyway we feel like . Not impose our standards like the rest of the society is doing to us
If we can't accept different ways of doing stuff , how can expect other to do the same for us .
Rain.
OK I have to get into this one.. Being a woman is more than dressing nice and wearing make-up, shaving legs and keeping up appearences it's about having a monthly peroid, having children, losing weight, gaining weight, bloating, mood swings, Pre menupause and menapause. If all I had to do was sit around and wonder when's my next time I can get dressed up and wear my new shoes or my new skirt life would be a blast but unfortunatly we have so much more to do being a GG.take it or leave it. Not meant to offend anyone but you opened this can of worms....
I don't wear makeup because I don't like the sensation of goop spread over my skin, and I would imagine that there are women who feel the same.
BI_ weird :You are absolutely correct !
Penny :you are totally wrong,but I respect freedom on all category.
Rain.
penny
i can tell this is a hot topic you are right on some things but after putting up with me for 36 plus years six kids in and out of the hospital four the last five years and haveing a ful time job i think she can do what she wants and look
the way she wants
P S i no this is not directed to any one G G just in general
wow OK what a thread .... we as Cd's talk abought feeling comfy in wearing woman's clothing and how it can make us relaxed and how we want to be accepted ... we look to act and be as GG'S ... thinking like a GG we still need to work on ..(as this thread shows ) OK like we can't wait to get all dolled up ...
one thing we need to think abought make up and getting all dressed fancy and that dose not make a GG a GG ... what makes a GG a GG is the person she is ... and that goes from a working woman to a stay at home mom...
i would think that here of all places we would practice a little thoughtful thinking with ac healthy dose of nonjudgmental apprentice and see that pre judging and blind statements are not only wrong but hurtful....
acceptance is a two way street.... judge not and you won't be judged ....
It's hypocrisy to criticize women for not fitting into rigid gender sterotypes when you're so free to excercise your own gender variance.
Hail Satin!
I couldn't have said it better!
I have commented on this, but not as short and sweet.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
Penny, I'm surprised by this thread. Perhaps you could have thought about the title? Made it less offensive?
This is a classic case of "walk a mile in my shoes" or "Seek first to understand, then be understood", Steven Covey.
As you stated, "my opinion", and you are entitled to it, however, you seem to be using a broad brush. You mentioned your Mother, could it be she is from a different generation? I think things have changed?
Maybe I'm wrong here, but, from what I gather from watching makeover shows on TV, is that women are far to caught up in their roles. And, that is admirable. For they express their love through their actions. They often neglect themselves for the sake of others. Hence, their appearance and their feelings for self may diminish. Seems to me this was a slow conditioning that may have taken generations to occur. Can we really fault todays modern woman for what has taken decades?
My perception, from watching these shows, and something we may all want to consider is, take care of ourselves first, so we may feel better about who we are, then we can take care of those around us better. It's a win/win.
Last edited by Sophia Rearen; 01-04-2007 at 11:50 AM.
[SIZE=4]Sophia[/SIZE]
My
Thanks for stirring the pot this morning Penny! Great entertainment!
Penny, there isn't much that upsets me, but this did.
[SIZE="3"]Reason:
[SIZE="4"]I've spent 50+ years walking on this earth, and I don't feel being pretty is an accomplishment. Helping the EARTH and IT"S INHABITANTS survive is a little more important, don't you think?[/SIZE][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3]KRAZYKAT [/SIZE]
Cuddling with my spouse of 18 yrs., GypsyKaren makes me Happy!!
I don't need to dress like an idealized man to be a man, I am a man (well, you know what I mean). When I dress like a guy I don't dress like my father or my grandfather. I don't dress slovenly (I am obese though) but I dress appropriately for the times. Times change, they always do.
That said, I'm getting the heck out of Alamogordo.
Androgynes: the quantum bits of the gender binary.
While it is nice to look nice (and we all like the ladies when they look nice), it's not always practical. As you say, I could work on my look and makeup pret near all day and not hold a candle to a GG's natural beauty. No way Jose. Sure we like looking nice Hon and we love it when real gals look nice but to be quite honest like many SO's they have a lot of work to do and sure don't wanna do it their nice clothes. The "June Cleaver" look went out years ago if it was ever truely real to begin with. I have been more or less full time for the past month and no way in New York am I gonna wear my nice clothes so I can clean toilets or do the laundry. I'm beginning to get a really true view from the "other side" here. When it comes to this kind of stuff women are practical., they have to be. Time is limited for a multi-tasker which is what most if not all of these gals are. They really could care less how a dress swishes on their legs while in the meat aisle of the grocery store looking for cuts or really care that they go "clippity clop" in heels when they walk. Trust me, I've been there.In all reality, women do like to look nice, especially for those they care for. On those occassions they do get that chance, it's nice to show that we appreciate their efforts in that respect. You are right when you say women look nice when they are all dressed up, of course they do, it just isn't always practical. I for one, love them no matter what they are wearing, especially all the GG's here because they are my friends and that pretty much says it all.Ericka
Second star to the right and straight on till morning
Dear Penny,
If you think being a woman is all makeup and pretty clothes you have a lot to learn, sweetie.
The women I work with are all women. They are WORKING. I see very little makeup and no pretty clothes, (just scrubs). I also see the most important aspects of femininity there are. I see this on a CONTINUAL basis. I see loving, caring, compasionate, selfless, hard working, uncomplaining, WOMEN. When these women are done, they go home to take care of their children and husbands. And clean the house and do the shopping.
Your remarks were sexist and unfeeling.
Stephenie
Penny,
First of all GGs have a natural beauty that has no need for "such decoration" to be respected.
Second, you took a poke at what I believe is a key element in the overall acceptance of CDs in general. The more that people dress in ways that express WHATEVER they feel, not what is socially expected, the sooner people will stop trying to categorize things as black and white or for our benefit girl and boy.
I consider those GGs strong allies on the front in a long "freedom of expression" battle.
You might want to check what side your on.
Dar
Last edited by DarleneCD; 01-04-2007 at 11:58 AM.
Just as an additional comment here, but couldn't our FtM members also say the same thing about the way the average male dresses?
We, members of a crossdressing forum, are almost always focused on how we look and on our appearance. But -- be ready for a shocker here -- most non-crossdressing people of the world are just not as interested 24/7 in what they are wearing, other than are they dressed appropriately for where they are and for weather conditions.
“I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.”
― Marilyn Monroe
We crossdressers should be the first peoples to promote liberty to dress, wear and look anyway we feel like . Not impose our standards like the rest of the society is doing to us
If we can't accept different ways of doing stuff , how can expect other to do the same for us .
That is what shocks me. A conservative southern belle attitude from a crossdresser ? ! ? ! I'm pretty sure that "proper gentlemen don't crossdress" in those social circles.
Judging people by what they wear ! ? ! ? I would've expected better.
***hang head in shame here***
In all fairness to Penny, having lived in the south, and with family currently there, she is expressing a very real southern social expectation of anyone wanting to be acceptable with middle-class or above society- proper ladies look just so - always. I don't agree or adhere to that with regards to clothes, but I am guilty of using "lady" behavior restrictions with my daughters. "Young ladies do not _______ "(fill in blank)
Last edited by Tree GG; 01-04-2007 at 04:23 PM. Reason: add
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